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Holes in Your Underwear (and Other Little Secrets)

We have all done it. That last pair of underwear in the drawers drawer is not something you would be proud to have others see you wearing. Your mother always told you not to leave home without pristine underwear in case of an accident. If there is no horrible occurrence to expose your nether regions to the world, who will know? You will, of course! Does it matter?

A superstitious mind will give unscientific believability to things that of themselves have no power over you. There is a debatable fine line between superstition and belief. Faith in something gives us comfort unless subconsciously, we know that our faith is not vested in something real. Couples who each wear half of a Mizpah coin shouldn’t believe there is some magical protection to having a gold talisman on a chain around their neck, but the prayer inscribed on it gives remembrance of that other person while apart from each other. It is that power within us that may make us a little more cautious of our actions out of love for them.

Psychologists tell us there is power in positive reminders of our belief system. It can be a cross-in-the-pocket, a Chai and Shema Israel medallion, an AA token commemorating hard work, or any of the hundreds of other items meaningful only to the one who holds them. The power they wield is as potent as the mind of the individual will allow. You hide these things because they are personal and not because they are symbols that you don’t want to reveal out of shame. They give a constant reassurance that we do believe in something and that our values do mean something. It appears that the mental preparation to face a life event is like preparing for a battle to win a war.

When they don’t know what you do can make a difference. Looking up “dressing up for a phone interview” on Google results over a million hits (million plus one after this one). It is also a confidence builder to not only dress for phone calls, standing up while talking gives confidence-building mobility to your speech patterns. Deep breathing practice can oxygenate brain cells to fire with their most effective interconnections. Sometimes, it’s not what you say as much as how you say it. A personal image is everything, and mindset controls your image.

Does a hole in your underwear affect your image when meeting someone face to face? The answer rests with how it makes you feel about yourself. Standing tall makes you feel powerful when it is not intimidating to others. Power posing can boost your confidence. An article in Psychology Today reports that little secrets decrease people’s overall sense of well-being. “People found themselves thinking about the secret three times more often than actively hiding it.” Even if you are the only one who knows about your inconsequential secret, the wasted energy to keep it secret can undermine your presentation and outward appearance.

What happens in your home stays at home unless others are involved. One reason working remotely from home can become a topic of distrust and disbelief on the part of management is because of the lack of trust that the employee is honest about time committed to work vs. time used for personal business. The mindset of an excellent offsite employee is one that prepares for the day at home, just as if they will be visible in an office full of coworkers. You must believe that about yourself when interviewing for such a job or requesting remote access to your work. In execution, you need to exercise a daily routine of getting up, showering, getting dressed (without holy underwear), and commuting 10-feet to your workplace.

If confession is supposed to be good for the soul, why can’t you tell someone you have holes in your underwear today? Well, no rule says you can’t. Only you will know and know the impact.

Photo Credit: © Luis Molinero Martnez via 123rf


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