Smart Networking Techniques

It is always easier to see the negatives than the positives. When we see someone using trickery and deception we know that is not networking. One criticism heard about using networking in a job search is that an individual has to be outgoing and give in to the ideas of others in order to be successful. Nothing could be further from the truth. Anything that appears to be phony is highly likely to be detected and recognized as a ploy rather than genuine conversation. Several of the rules of networking that have proved to be helpful are those I learned from Dale Carnegie’s book How to Win Friends and Influence People: Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain; and give honest and sincere appreciation. Nowhere does he advise being anything other than honest and sincere. One tenet in particular will shift a monolog to a dialog: Talk in terms of the other person’s interest. Nowhere does it say to suck up or be a fake.

The meeting of two sincere networkers should be one that gives a low stress entry into a conversation. Job seekers will ultimately have to sell themselves, but they also need to relate to the recruiters representing employers that have openings. In my advice to those looking for employment, I always encourage trying to think like a recruiter. What makes them do what they do when they do it? What do employers want? The job seeker that can find out what keeps hiring managers up at night will be more likely to communicate something of value from their own experience. Conversely, recruiters that forget what it is like to look for work need to revisit the things that irritated them about employers. If it was bad then, it is probably still bad now. Following Carnegie’s advice, don’t lead with a negative, find out what the other person in the conversation is thinking, and always say thank you.

The problem with low profile networkers, like those who see themselves as shy or introverted, is finding the starting point for the dialog. Forgive the sporting analogy, but if you are looking to be caught, swim where they are fishing and if you are looking to make a catch, fish where they are swimming. The fact that you may not know how to open a conversation is a moot point if you put yourself in situations in which the other person starts. All you have to know is how to stand tall, pause, and reply. Online the best place to engage with fish and fishers is probably LinkedIn. It is relatively easy to find out someone’s interests and background without much intrusiveness. Facebook, Twitter, and other social media outlets can serve as introductory points for determining that common interest or idea. Offline may be more challenging for many, but user groups, conferences, and meet-ups are places that are loaded with people of common interests.

As with anything, don’t expect perfection before practicing. The reason there is a law requiring a license before driving a car is because an individual needs to know all the rules and have some actual wheel time before being allowed on the roads. Maybe there should be a networking license. Learn the rules about cordial dialog and practice shaking hands a lot before charging into a crowded meeting.

Image Credit: 123RF Stock Photo